Nein Danke!

Hello! Here I am again with my ramblings. First up, the crap that's been on Radio Two in the last month or so.

AMY MACDONALD - Mr Rock and Roll

Christ this is awful. I’m unclear what it’s about, but there’s something almost nauseatingly embarrassing about her singing about someone being rock and roll. It’s like a shoddy uncle trying to do a hip-hop dance. The music itself is so remarkably uninspired and cliched that its pointlessness is almost remarkable. Almost. Her voice is deeply unsubtle, like a blunt hacksaw. Finally, ‘multicultural’ is not a suitable word for a pop song. And actually, nor are most of the other words in the song, not in this combination at least.

BEN'S BROTHER – Let Me Out

Have you seen (at top) what this lot look like? It’s like an advert for banality. Anyway, song starts with emo piano, alarms bells should be ringing around now. The vocal wanders in, with some shit lyrics, and the voice is a cross between Steve McFadden (on that duet CD he did with Barbara Windsor. Or whatever) and Joe Pasquale. Essentially unpleasant is what I’m saying. The mixed messages in the chorus elevate it from bland to actually annoying (‘Let me out. Or let me in'. WHICH IS IT TO BE?).

JAMES BLUNT – 1973

Born in 1974, the only way James would have been in a club in 1973 is if his pregnant mother had been there, no doubt passively inhaling cigarette smoke, which as we all know can lead to birth defects. I put it to you that James’ birth defect is to be condemned to a life of producing shite, annoying MOR songs.

RUFUS WAINWRIGHT - Rules And Regulations
Rufus’ previous song irritated me so much that I would leave the room when I came on, much like when Big Girl by Mika comes on. His Thom Yorke esque voice is whiny, and just so gloomy. This song sucks the life-force out of me. What fucking rules and regulations are you on about anyway? Cheer up goth.

NELLY FURTADO - In God's Hands

I don’t have much to say about this, but why is it that some singers often do say, two or three great upbeat tracks then follow it up with this kind of drivel?

Also rans: NATALIE IMBRUGLIA – Glorious/ GOLDSPOT – Friday.